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  • Writer's pictureAleksandra Veselinović

Should I Change or Should I Give Up?

Andy Warhol was a leading figure in the visual art movement known as pop art. Recognized as influential and controversial artist, he walked the change talk, promoting it as a way of being.

Who would dare to doubt that Andy the Change was the one who knew it all?! No matter what one may think about his art, or hair- dress, he was so damn right about one change- related illusions:

“They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself

So where is this paradox rooted so we have a need to change, but don’t really want to?

True, there may be no harder task for adults than changing our behavior. Those among us who tried to move one from the job or a relationship we’ve been unhappy with, know how it feels…When needed we are geniuses at coming up with reasons to avoid change. We make excuses. We rationalize. We harbor beliefs that trigger all manner of denial and resistance.

As a result, we continually fail at becoming the person we want to be. Why? Because we are stuck in between our past and future, wondering with a fear, what we are to lose and what the future will bring, instead.

As always, we have plenty of options.

Option A) Do something; be brave and proactive, no matter what.

Option B) Wait for somebody else to do this for you. It may be a long wait, though, but you always can transfer a blame for potential failure on somebody. Play big, that somebody can be big as the Life itself, Universe, or even God, or plenty of Gods if one is not enough for such a big blame.

Option C) Go back to bad. In this case please choose a colorful pajama, since you will need at least something to feel like you did anything meaningful.

D) Try with experienced professional. No need to go through change alone. If so, choose somebody who theoretical knowledge successfully transfers via practical show- how, supporting you to set up your goal, broadening perspective while targeting old barriers, current resources and realistic options.

This is how the process of making of conscious choice goes. The only step missing is action. To understand the problem, we not only have to admit there’s a problem; we also have to appreciate all the options. And with behavioral change, we have options. Should I change or should I give up? Make a conscious choice. If you still count on time, please be aware that the time- caused changes are not necessarily the ones we wish. Mirrors know it all.

By Aleksandra Veselinović

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